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可怜的梭罗——读《瓦尔登湖》翻译(106)  

2011-11-20 15:56:51|  分类: 《瓦尔登湖》 |  标签: |举报 |字号 订阅

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Undoubtedly, in this case, what is true for one is truer still for a thousand, as a large house is not proportionally more expensive than a small one, since one roof may cover, one cellar underlie, and one wall separate several apartments. But for my part, I preferred the solitary dwelling. Moreover, it will commonly be cheaper to build the whole yourself than to convince another of the advantage of the common wall; and when you have done this, the common partition, to be much cheaper, must be a thin one, and that other may prove a bad neighbor, and also not keep his side in repair. The only co?peration which is commonly possible is exceedingly partial and superficial; and what little true co?peration there is, is as if it were not, being a harmony inaudible to men. If a man has faith, he will co?perate with equal faith everywhere; if he has not faith, he will continue to live like the rest of the world, whatever company he is joined to. To co?perate in the highest as well as the lowest sense, means to get our living together. I heard it proposed lately that two young men should travel together over the world, the one without money, earning his means as he went, before the mast and behind the plow, the other carrying a bill of exchange in his pocket. It was easy to see that they could not long be companions or co?perate, since one would not operate at all. They would part at the first interesting crisis in their adventures. Above all, as I have implied, the man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready, and it may be a long time before they get off.< xmlnamespace prefix ="o" ns ="urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

    (徐迟译)无疑的在这里,凡是对一个人是真实的,对于一千个人也是真实的,正像一幢大房子,按比例来说,并不比一座小房子来得更浪费钱财;一个屋顶可以盖住几个房间,一个地窖可以躺在几个房间的下面,一道道墙壁更可以分隔出许多房间来。我自己是喜欢独居的。再说,全部由你自己来筑造,比你拿合用一道墙的好处去说服邻家要便宜得多;如果你为了便宜的缘故跟别家合用了墙,这道墙一定很薄,你隔壁住的也许不是一个好邻居,而且他也不修理他那一面的墙一般能够做到的合作只是很小的部分,而且是表面上的;要有点儿真正的合作心意,表面上反而看不出来,却有着一种听不见的谐和。如果一个人是有信心的,他可以到处用同样的信心与人合作;如果他没有信心,他会像世界上其余的人一样,继续过他自己的生活,不管他跟什么人做伴。合作的最高意义与最低意义,乃是让我们一起生活。最近我听说有两个年轻人想一起作环球旅行,一个是没有钱的,一路上要在桅杆前,在犁锄后,挣钱维持生活,另一个袋里带着旅行支票。这是很明白的,他们不可能长久地做伴或合作,因为这一合作中有一人根本不作什么。在他们旅行中第一个有趣的危机发生之时,他们就要分手。最主要的是我已经说过的,一个单独旅行的人要今天出发就出发;而结伴的却得等同行的准备就绪,他们出发之前可能要费很长的时日。

1one roof may cover, one cellar underlie, and one wall separate several apartments.

徐译:一个屋顶可以盖住几个房间,一个地窖可以躺在几个房间的下面,一道道墙壁更可以分隔出许多房间来。

戴译:一个大屋顶能为几个单间共用。一个地窖也可以位于几个单间之下,只是用一道道墙隔离起来罢了。

王译:一个屋顶可以覆盖几个套间,一个地下室可以位于几个套间的底下,而一堵墙也可以把几个套间分隔开。

几个动词共一个宾语时,除了重复宾语,有没有更好的处理方式?既是同一宾语,重复时应完全一致,还是需要变化一些?

2it will commonly be cheaper to build the whole yourself than to convince another of the advantage of the common wall

徐译“比你拿合用一道公墙的好处去说服邻家”,其结构是“比{[拿(合用)的好处]去说服邻家}要好”,这多层关系倒也正确,但字面上“比你拿合用”连在一起,仍然给读者带来理解的困难,需要读到后面再返回来读一遍才能明白其义。相比之下,戴译“比费劲口舌说服隔壁邻居共用一道墙”就熨平了这一疙瘩。

it will commonly be cheaper中的“commonly”一词没有译出来。

3If a man has faith, he will co?perate with equal faith everywhere; if he has not faith, he will continue to live like the rest of the world, whatever company he is joined to.

faith”一词,译“信心”感觉不如“信念”或“信仰”好。

戴译把“continue to live”漏掉了。

4they could not long be companions or co?perate, since one would not operate at all. 若是能把co?perateoperate在形式上相近的趣味也译出来就更好了。

5Above all, as I have implied, the man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready, and it may be a long time before they get off.

戴译漏了“Above all”,且把这一句与上一句连到了一起。

can start today”应该是明确无误的。王译“能够今天就动身”可以;徐译“要今天出发就出发”就增加了表达假设的“要”字,而戴译“可以随便何时出发”意在“可早亦可晚”,而“可晚”却不是句子要说的。

戴译把最后一句“it may be a long time before they get off”译作“等待往往要浪费很长时间”,也是个错误。

(戴欢译)毫无疑问,在此种情形下,对一个人而言是真实的事情,对一千个人而言仍是真实的。正如一座大房子,按比例计算,并不比一座小房子造价更为昂贵,因为一个大屋顶能为几个单间共用。一个地窖也可以位于几个单间之下,只是用一道道墙隔离起来罢了。但对我来说,我还是喜欢离群索居。而且,自己独建一座房屋,比费劲口舌说服隔壁邻居共用一道墙要来得更便宜些;如果你跟邻居共用了一道墙,虽说省了不少钱,但这墙必定造得很薄;若你的隔壁邻居碰巧是个坏邻居,他也不会对他那一边的墙进行细心维护。通常情况下,人们可以开展的合作是非常有限的,而且很肤浅。而真诚的合作却并非只是做做表面的文章,他有着一种不可耳闻的和谐之音。假若一个人充满信心,那么他可以随处以相同的信心与人合作;假若他缺乏信心,他会像世上的其他人一样,无所作为,无论他与何人携手并肩。合作的最高意义和最低意义,均意味着“让我们共同生活”。

最近,我听说有两位年轻人想结伴做环球旅行。其中一人是没钱的,沿途要靠在桅杆之前、在铁犁之后挣钱谋生;另外一人则在口袋里揣着旅行支票。我们可以轻易看出,他们难以长期结伴或合作,因为其中有一人完全不用“工作”。当他们在旅途中出现第一个有趣的危机时,他们就要散伙,各奔东西,正如我在前面指出的那样,一个孤身旅行的人可以随便何时出发;而要结伴旅行,一个人还得等待另一个人准备就绪后才能出发,等待往往要浪费很长时间

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